I’m not supposed to be here this week. Instead, I’m supposed to be in Asheville, North Carolina and then Des Moines, Iowa. Though both are known as international tourist hotspots in March, I was actually set to go for business. Near the last minute, the trip got pushed back a couple of weeks. These kinds of things happen, I suppose, so I went online to cancel and rebook my flights, hotels, and car rentals.
As it turns out, doing that was a pain in the ass and took a lot longer than I expected. I got through it though, had my new electronic reservations, and was ready to go. Then Monday morning came, and I got an email saying that my flight that day was scheduled to be on-time. Ruh roh. I went online to make sure I had successfully cancelled that flight, and I was surprised by what I saw.
First, I saw that the flight to North Carolina was not listed under “Current Trips.” Second, under “Cancelled Trips,” I saw my second and third legs of the trip, but not the first. So it was neither active nor inactive. Hmm. But that’s not all, my friends; a new flight had appeared out of nowhere. Somehow (I know not how), there was a flight from Midway in Chicago to… Midway in Chicago. Oh, and the date of that flight? January 1, 1970. I was magically booked on a flight from and to the same place that I should try to board when I’m negative 7.5 years old. And this is why we should be afraid of the machines taking over.
I called customer service and explained my predicament. When I pointed out the phantom Chicago flight, I added, “And I assure you I won’t be able to make that one.” She confirmed that I was cancelled on all of the ones for my initial trip and apologized for the confusion. As luck would have it, my trip was pushed back a couple of more weeks, so I’ll have the joy of rebooking again in the next day or so. Maybe I can get lucky and find another phantom flight on my itinerary. And maybe this time I should check to see if it’s actually some kind of time-travel wormhole before I cancel it. I’m just sayin’.