Today’s devalued word epitomizes everything the devalued word stands for, or rather, doesn’t. You know a word has gone bankrupt when it implies exactly the opposite of the literal definition.
And that’s what has happened with today’s word, “Professional.” Thanks to descrupled marketers, the word professional is now shorthand for “Hey, let’s be honest. You don’t want to spend that kind of money on a socket wrench set. But you’re in luck, because this is the set that professional socket wrenchers actually buy. And somehow I also cost less than the other ones. Buy me.”
In fact, professional is the moniker that people attach to professions that aren’t. Chances are, when people tell you they’re a “Professional _____,” it really means “Yes, for a living I do this thing that you never knew anybody could do for a living. I am a professional hula hooper. And one day I hope to make money doing it.” You never hear people say “I’m a professional doctor” or “I’m a professional police officer.”
One exception I add here is the word “pro,” which is different than professional. You can be a pro surfer, pro skateboarder, or pro snowboarder and make serious money rivaled only by the unplumbed depths of pussy it also earns. Until recently I wouldn’t have included pro golfers in this group.
I find it telling that GMC chooses that word to describe their line. “Professional Grade.” I’m biased against domestic cars, but they did receive 3 bailouts from the government. Maybe all the professional pickup truck drivers lost their jobs?
So let’s beware the professional moniker until marketers stop being professional swindlers.
